You know, ever since I posted that last column, talking about the August 2008 solicitations for DC Comics, my mail box has been stuffed full of letters, all wanting to know the same thing...
What about the Marvel Comics??? Will there be Skrulls??? Will there be lots and lots of Skrulls??? Will it light up the whole world...?
Well, now, just calm yourself down, li'l feller... there'll be Skrulls! Heck, yeah, there'll be Skrulls... Skrulls enough for you, your friends, your family, and even enough for ol' Mrs. Wilson who lives down the road...
Skrull limited series! Skrull crossovers! Skrull t-shirts and Skrull coffee mugs! Skrulls enough to fill all your Skrully needs!!!
But that's not all...
In addition to the ubiquitous Skrull tie-ins (SECRET INVASION #5, MIGHTY AVENGERS #17, NEW AVENGERS #44, AVENGERS: THE INITIATIVE #16, SECRET INVASION: INHUMANS #1 (of 4), SECRET INVASION: THOR #1 (of 3), SECRET INVASION: X-MEN #1 (of 4), SECRET INVASION: SPIDER-MAN: BRAND NEW DAY #1 (of 3), SECRET INVASION: RUNAWAYS/YOUNG AVENGERS #3 (of 3), SECRET INVASION: FRONT LINE #2 (of 5), GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY #4, NOVA #16, INCREDIBLE HERCULES #120, MS. MARVEL #30, CAPTAIN BRITAIN AND MI:13 #4, X-FACTOR #34, SHE-HULK #32, THUNDERBOLTS #123, NEW WARRIORS #15, BLACK PANTHER #40, and, of course, SKRULLS VS. POWER PACK #2 (of 4)) there are a few other things coming out in August as well...
[In case you're wondering, that's 21 different titles tying into the big Skrull storyline in August... at about 3 bucks a pop, that's roughly 63 dollars for August... if, y'know, you wanna follow the Skrull storyline in its total awesome-nality-ness...]
And while we're talking about the Skrulls... incidentally... and just so none of you go running around and accusing me of xenophobia... I'd just like to point out that I did, in fact, purchase and read Secret Invasion #1, as well as the New Avengers and Mighty Avengers tie-ins that came out in April, and I actually quite enjoyed them all...
So, let's just be careful about that rumor-mongering, yeah...?
But, as I was saying... not everything is about the Skrulls, y'know. There's some other stuff coming out in August of interest...
"Such as...?" you ask, in that taunting, mocking tone that absolutely makes me want to slug you...
Well, lemme tell ya...
SPIDER-MAN SUMMER SPECIAL
Written by KEITH GIFFEN & PAUL TOBIN
Art by RICK BURCHETT & COLLEEN COOVER
August is still summer, right? Yeah? COOL! Then we’re hittin’ ya up with two ALL-NEW Spidey stories from times when he wasn’t Secretly Invading or Branding New Days. First, Spidey teams up with Falcon to handle an outbreak of futuristic weaponry showing up in Harlem, and then MARY JANE takes center stage as she teams up with She-Hulk, Hellcat, Marvel Girl and some other lovely ladies to take on The Enchantress, in this one-shot!48 PGS./Rated A …$3.99
Why is this of interest? Well, I'll give you four reasons...
1) Keith Giffen
2) Paul Tobin
3) Rick Burchett (He's actually sort of hit-or-miss... used to love his art, but his work on She-Hulk was just plain lame...)
4) Colleen Coover
And then there's this...
And then there's this...
SPIDER-MAN LOVES MARY JANE #1 (of 5)
Written by TERRY MOORE
Penciled by CRAIG ROUSSEAU
Cover by TERRY MOORE
At long, long, long, looooooooooooooooong last, SHE’S BACK!Mary Jane Watson, in her very own adventures! Superstar writer Terry Moore (Strangers in Paradise, upcoming RUNAWAYS) supplies story (and covers!) and artist Craig Rousseau (The Perhapanauts) brings his best for this all-new mini.It’s the beginning of a new high school year. MJ finally feels like she’s got her life in order. Good friends, good classes, good relationship with a certain Wall-Crawler…but is there someone behind the scenes that’s got it in for our rambunctious redhead?
32 PGS./All Ages …$2.99
Okay, so... why-oh-why am I recommending something called Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane?
Is it because I'm a total dweeb?
Sure, there's that... but it's also because it's being written by Terry Moore.
I don't know if it'll be great... I don't even know if it'll be good... but, at the very least, it oughtta be interesting...
FANTASTIC FOUR: TRUE STORY #2 (of 4)
Written by PAUL CORNELL
Penciled by HORACIO DOMINGUEZ
The FF's emergency exploration of the worlds of fiction continues as they burst through the covers of Ivanhoe and start to gather an army against the onrushing darkness. And the surprise villain behind this whole weird collision is revealed! (Warning: do not keep True Story too close to your other comic books. It may freak them out.)
32 PGS./Rated A …$2.99
I talked about this limited series quite a lot last month, so I'll just say this... Ivanhoe meets Fantastic Four.
Guaranteed Hollywood summer blockbuster...
MARVEL ADVENTURES THE AVENGERS #27
Written by JEFF PARKER
Penciled by IG GUARA
Cover by LEONARD KIRK
Marvel: Okay, 27 is your final Avengers issue- we're expecting something special.
Parker: Oh don't you worry, it will be. Heh.
Marvel: Really? Great! Who's in it?
Parker: Um... the guy with the thing- trust me, it's going to RAWK.
Marvel: You don't know what the story is yet, do you.
Parker: -think my phone's running out of juice-zzzz-can barely hear you--- bwip*
32 PGS./All Ages …$2.99
Now that's what I call a solicitation...
MARVEL ADVENTURES SUPER HEROES #2
Written by PAUL TOBIN
Penciled by ALVIN LEE
Iron Man, Hulk and Spidey rocket into space to stop a potentially devastating meteor shower from reaching Earth, but are surprised to find the meteors are actually Meteor Men, a group of intergalactic frat boys engaging in their most awesomely favorite extreme sport: Planet-Bombing. After negotiations (Could the Hulk quit hitting us, please?) the Meteor Men agree not to bombard Earth IF the heroes show them an equally good time on a variety of other planets, and other extreme sports. Will our heroes survive Albernathean Rhino Riding? How about Kree Karaoke? Or the galaxy’s most dangerous extreme sport, Black Hole Bungee Jumping?
32 PGS./All Ages …$2.99
I'm going to be seriously disappointed if there isn't really Kree Karaoke in that comic...
Written by TERRY MOORE
Pencils & Cover by HUMBERTO RAMOS
Come see the beginning of a whole new Runaways! Comics legend Terry Moore (Strangers in Paradise, Echo) and super-star artist Humberto Ramos (X-MEN, WOLVERINE, SPIDER-MAN) run back to Los Angeles with your favorite teen heroes. But it’s not the same city they left so long ago. The Runaways try to stay off the radar, but the sins of their parents won’t make that possible…
32 PGS./Rated T+ …$2.99
Again with the Terry Moore...
So, I really have no idea if this new Runaways series is going to be any good or not... it could go either way. I will say this... the recent storyline by Whedon has been unbearable. I mean, no, it's not really that bad of a story... God knows we've all read worse... but the sheer mediocrity of the writing and the art combined with the erratic scheduling has really sucked the fun and excitement out of this series...
The biggest question mark here is going to be the art by Ramos... you can tell by the cover that he's going for a pretty radically different look than the previous artists... and I'm just not sure how well it's going to work. But, hey, I'll give it a shot...
NYX: NO WAY HOME #1 (of 6)
Written by MARJORIE LIU
Penciled by KALMAN ANDRASOFSZKY
Cover by ALINA URUSOV
There’s no place like home—just ask young mutant KIDEN NIXON. She’s survived the hard streets of Manhattan, and she’s built a home—and a family—for herself, with her friends TATIANA, BOBBY SOUL and his LI’L BRO. But with fewer than 200 mutants left on the planet, Kiden’s become a target—and when somebody strikes at one of her friends, Kiden’s going to find out just how much farther she can fall! Don’t miss the breathtaking return of this beloved series, by NEW YORK TIMES best-selling writer MARJORIE LIU (the DIRK & STEELE SERIES) with stunning art by KALMAN ANDRASOFSZKY! Plus—a special behind-the-scenes gallery!
40 PGS./Parental Advisory …$3.99
Wow. This looks... powerful.
Ha! No, I'm just kidding... I don't actually know anything at all about Marjorie Liu or Kalman Andravsky... er... Kalman A., and maybe they're both brilliant and maybe... just maybe... I will live to regret my flippant dismissal of their fine new limited series, but here's what I do know...
Bobby Soul is a really, really stupid name.
I mean, seriously... that's right out of those 1970's "socially relevant" Green Lantern/Green Arrow comics by O'Neil and Adams...
This issue: Green Arrow and Green Lantern must face the grim underbelly of the ghettoes in the tale we simply had to call:
"Bobby Soul Don't Live Here No More!"
And Li'l Bro?
"Sweet Christmas!!! It's Li'l Bro!!!"
So, here's the math on that...
Bobby Soul + Li'l Bro + "She's survived the hard streets of Manhatten" + mutant angst = six issues of solid Turd
That's what I know about that...
And on that lovely note, I bid you farewell with this very special message to that group of Democrat women who have publicly vowed to NOT vote for Barack Obama if he wins the Democratic nomination... which he already has, by the way...
It's all fine and well that you would like for there to be a female president... it's ridiculous that there hasn't been one up until now and I can well understand your frustration...
McCain??? Supreme Court nominations???
I'm just saying...